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I arrived early at Stanton on another dry as planned early on another dry but misty morning but was dismayed to see that the hospital blood test and the doctor’s appointment had been deferred until the next day so that Freda and Alf could get to the railway station and thence home. I phoned and managed to reinstate these (just) and learnt a lot about Mum’s condition and capabilities from being there. We had visits from the home help manager, the caravan site manager and friends and an occupational therapist visit is now planned soon.
I rushed back to an evening Little Paxton Parish Council meeting and subsequent Christmas social, which went well. The Czechoslovakian Prime Minister resigned, and the deputy premier is forming a government and, in East Germany, an ex-leader is arrested on corruption charges and free elections are due next May
I was up early to take the remainder of Mum’s things across to Stanton. I arrived as planned 8:30am and was prepared to take Mum to Bury St Edmunds hospital for a blood test and get her back for the doctor’s appointment at Mum’s home. I learnt to my dismay that the doctor’s appointment had been put back until tomorrow and that the first priority was to get Freda and Alf to the railway station for an even earlier departure. It seemed to me that they were leaving with indecent haste before Mum’s arrangements had been settled and that I was also being grossly inconvenienced. I phoned and reinstated the appointment for Dr Bawden, dropped Freda and Alf off at the station to get them out of our hair, and managed to get Mum through the blood test and back before the doctor arrived. I was lucky that he had been called away on an emergency and had been delayed facilitating this original plan.
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Mum goes home to Stanton today as we pack up her things in Dad’s old car and take her there. I chat to a few neighbours and make some arrangements before returning home to collect Della from school and the rest of Mum’s things from Weald House. After accompanying Daniel to his Brunel University interview, Di rushes back and we go to see Deborah’s school pantomime performance. More revolutionary change in East Germany with Egon Krantz, the state president, resigning.
After the arrangements and events of late, it was time to take Mum back to Stanton with Freda and Alf today to try to get her settled. She had agreed to give it a proper try yesterday and so I got the rest of us ready and we went over early to collect her and her things from Weald House. We loaded up without too much disruption, though Mum was as nervous as ever at packing for the journey. We managed to get most of the urgent things in Dad’s little estate car in which I was returning, loaded, and left the remainder of her things together for a collection later. The journey itself was very easy and, within an hour, we were pulling up outside number 105 Shepherds Grove Park. I settled them in, went off and bought sandwiches for the multitude, and then attended to a few property matters whilst talking to several of Mum’s friends and neighbours.
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Intense family discussions about Mum trying seriously to try staying back at Stanton and she resolved to do so after some persuasion. Another visit to Dad’s grave on a fine morning to see his flowers and tributes again. The news today is that 50 fellow Conservative MPs refuse to support Thatcher’s continued leadership
An early morning start after a night of little sleep. Freda had a hard time this morning. Yesterday had been a daze to her and Alf was unhappy at the prospect of time away from Cornwall if his efforts to help Mum settle into Stanton were in vain. This morning, on another fine day, we went (Di, Freda and Alf and I) up to the cemetery and had another look at the flowers which had been nicely laid on Dad’s grave. I remembered to take our camera and so we photographed the flowers from each and every angle so as to capture and identify their elegance and design.
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Dad’s funeral – We awoke to find a thick fog, but it cleared and the sun came out to become exceptionally still, mild and sunny weather. It was a first class to send off for Dad! They certainly turned out for him; relatives, friends, colleagues and neighbours alike. I was proud of him and of the comments variously voiced, that I was so much like him in terms of mannerisms, voice etc.
The close family gathered with Mum at The Hayling View and then the cortege proceeded firstly to St James Church, Little Paxton, for the service. The coach had arrived from Stanton and many other cars as well went on to Little Paxton cemetery for the committal where there was a long line of floral tributes which Funeral Director Peter McGarry read individually to Mum and I as we passed.
Then afterwards the transport home to The Hayling View for the Wake where we set up Mum on her wheelchair in our front hall, welcoming each visitor as they came in for refreshments. Di’s family helped Joan dispense a seemingly endless supply of tea, sandwiches, cakes, mince pies and sausage rolls. Contrary to my prediction, they had a good appetite and we could hardly keep up. back at.
It was a fine and happy occasion; the service and burial had been well done, the whole well attended and the companionship a great comfort and compensation. We particularly thanked The Rev Peter Lewis for his service and the Funeral Director for the arrangements. The taxi took mum back to Weald House and the rest of us tidied up the chairs and collapsed with exhaustion.
I slept reasonably well considering the day ahead but was concerned to awake and find thick fog. At least there was no frost and then, as the morning progressed, the fog dispersed, and the sun came out. We were up between times and, after breakfast was eaten, we all did various tasks to complete our readiness for the service. I changed, tested out the Rolls-Royce and put it and the other cars out of the way so that they would not get blocked in. First to arrive was in the disabled taxi at 10am. Then Ivy Arthur and Keith Barrett with Elaine in June shortly followed by mum’s sisters Vi, Olive and Nancy and Olive’s husband Stan. Together with us these formed the close relatives of Mum and Dad’s that would be following the coffin into the church.
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